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Location: Midwest, United States

"Power lines, my travlin' partner on this ride. Dripping, pulling - up and down, in this sing song, their lullaby blends with the swaying train. I curl myself into this journey; folding myself up into this pocket of time. Old familiars greet me - that swing set in the back yard, the ruins of an old church covered in new birth and old - mixed with unremembered newness." Journal Entry, October 13, 2005~ ~~~~~~~~~~~~All words are copyrighted by GoGo on a Page/gogoroku.

Wednesday, April 25, 2007

Tonight in the Art Gallery

This is my new find in blogville. Click here if you too love photos, photography, or simply appreciate a good shot or two. Definitely a fun page for the photography lover.

~Tootles. GoGo

Um, I thought I'd actually post.

I fold up yesterday softly into my pocket, the residuals of two years summed up in a ceremony invite. My list is almost complete, I am just that many steps, out of what felt like a thousand baby steps, closer to the prize. There is a little butterfly dancing in the belly, a tiny thing not sure what to do with the free time. A flutter of anticipation; I interviewed for a new job today. One thing begins its end; I open myself to the beginning of new things. One step closer to London, making more money to hold onto for the journey. Its still here, but its meant to get me there.

I go home, knocking on my own door to let me in. A steady beat under my shirt, I enter. I am not sure what to do with myself, except smile and avoid those side-kick piles steep against my wall for one more night. I begin to think about cleaning my home, so I can prepare to pack up my life. It’s time to decide what goes into storage, what is given away, and what is to be recycled. It’s time to wash my walls of its herstory, my story built up from three years living here – four before I go. I pause realizing that all this time I have given myself to prepare for moving across the sea has done nothing to comfort the impetuousness in it all, but left room for the constant twitter of disbelief that I am really doing this. I am really doing this.

In the last week, I came full circle. Feeling unsure, a little isolated, and not knowing anyone the first month in school, I was considered a non-traditional student because of my age. I was one of four lesbians in the program. I was living alone. It just felt weird. That first semester was me just trying to figure out what I was looking for in this whole experience, besides the degree. Then, my own quirky self kind of just fit in. Labels were removed and I found myself being this self without apology or doubt. Time took care of the rest. I walked into my 30s during this time. Walked into an age that felt comfortable. I should admit, past 25, all ages feel comfortable. I said goodbye to so many these last few weeks. People who have shared in the blood, sweat and tears in this entire school thing. I already have coffee dates and promised guests for London. Already know I will see many again on this universal path. Knowing this circle does not end here.

Now, its time to stop, take out my yesterday from the pocket and place it quietly on the bedside table. Time to put away all these thoughts. Time to sleep before tomorrow.

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Blogger kenju said...

Gogo, thanks for the visit and comments. I will be happy to have you do the interview. Just asnwer any five of the questions (or more) and post your answers here. Please let me know when you do it. Thanks!

10:14 PM, April 25, 2007  
Blogger Jane said...

Your post really resonates with me today. I will be moving in the next year or so from a beautiful little house that I've been in for 10 years. It's not my choice, as the property is being sold. Still, the house has a certain spirit that I will forever miss. It's time though. Time for new beginnings. I can feel the excitement in your voice as you face your new beginnings.

10:11 AM, April 26, 2007  
Blogger twitches said...

This comment has been removed by the author.

7:57 PM, April 27, 2007  
Blogger twitches said...

oops - messed up last time...

"All ages, past 25, feel comfortable."

Ooooh I hate to say this, but I'd amend that to say, "all ages between 25 and 35 feel comfortable." At 36, I started to realize, oh SHIT, I'm aging! And yeah, my body began to show it, too...

I am no longer so comfortable with my age, and for the first time, when I go places, I feel OLDER than quite a few people. It's weird. I don't feel old yet, just...OLDER.

Something for you to look forward to! Ha!

7:58 PM, April 27, 2007  

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