Just Put Me in the Middle & Call Me One of Them
"It’s a quiet night. The eyes sway back and forth following the streetlights up and down the avenue. Cars randomly disperse the quiet into humming motors and tires singing A Cappella to the street. I’m tired. It’s been a long day and a long week. I’m the kind of tired that solicits the soul to acquiesce to the exhaustion in it all, and yet I know I still have more to do tonight. I want to be a streetlight tonight, turning on and off by the rise and set of the sun."
~Journal Entry 4/16/06~
I wrote this last night in the midst of things to do. I was tired and feeling mighty low from the physicalness of it all. The rest of the entry sounded like one melancholy whine about just needing help with it all. Dear Heavens, I needed a violin and some cheese*. Then came the morning, complete with the sun rising above the horizon and I felt a little stronger. No one said the road I took would be easy. Hell, if it was, I'd probably find a way to complicate it anyway.
I am in the midst of change these days, more then turning time into a degree. At least I hope so. The one thing I have learned is that I have no problem "Going to school". This I can do and have always done, turning education into a tool to move me forward. What I thought was taking a leap was really me just leaping back into a realm I am very familiar with. No one ever told me I'd go to college, being earmarked at a young age for trade schools. If it hadn't been for my best friend in junior high school who was colleged bound, I wouldn't have had the language to manuever the college process. But here I am, the perfect example of college material...once again.
Ah, but I shouldn't take this for granted. I know how lucky I am, this priviledge is not something that everyone has where I come from. I simply made the decision not to stay in the box I was put into when I was young.
What was the point of this entry? I wanted to turn my exhaustion into a brilliant statement about outlook, humor, and self-reliance. Damn. Fell short on that one. Oh well, guess I need more sleep...so here is yet another picture of Drew for the world. Oh, and Kathryn too.
~Journal Entry 4/16/06~
I wrote this last night in the midst of things to do. I was tired and feeling mighty low from the physicalness of it all. The rest of the entry sounded like one melancholy whine about just needing help with it all. Dear Heavens, I needed a violin and some cheese*. Then came the morning, complete with the sun rising above the horizon and I felt a little stronger. No one said the road I took would be easy. Hell, if it was, I'd probably find a way to complicate it anyway.
I am in the midst of change these days, more then turning time into a degree. At least I hope so. The one thing I have learned is that I have no problem "Going to school". This I can do and have always done, turning education into a tool to move me forward. What I thought was taking a leap was really me just leaping back into a realm I am very familiar with. No one ever told me I'd go to college, being earmarked at a young age for trade schools. If it hadn't been for my best friend in junior high school who was colleged bound, I wouldn't have had the language to manuever the college process. But here I am, the perfect example of college material...once again.
Ah, but I shouldn't take this for granted. I know how lucky I am, this priviledge is not something that everyone has where I come from. I simply made the decision not to stay in the box I was put into when I was young.
What was the point of this entry? I wanted to turn my exhaustion into a brilliant statement about outlook, humor, and self-reliance. Damn. Fell short on that one. Oh well, guess I need more sleep...so here is yet another picture of Drew for the world. Oh, and Kathryn too.
Here's to beautiful, smart women who live(d) life the way the want(ed) to.
*The cheese is to go with the whine. ;O)
posted by GoGo | 7:43 AM
4 Comments:
Well, then, you are surely in good company!!
I hope you get the rest you need and that your day is beautiful.
~Josephine
I did get the rest I needed.
Thank goodness!
I couldn't think of a title for this entry, so I thought why not?
Just had to say thanks for putting a wonderful smile on my face and laugh in my throat with your last paragraph. I hope you have some good rest!
JTL
xxx
I also meant to thank for you lovely comment on my "shifts within" post. It was SO touching! I appreciate your words often! I love coming to your blog and seeing how you are doing and what inspiration you have for the world today (even if you didn't mean it to be inspirational!!)
Hugs to you!
JTL
xxx
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