Go Through the Window, baby. Go!

Okay, my heart is beating fast still. Finally, the bat is out of my home!

I couldn’t find it earlier today. I looked everywhere with my ball cap on and this mesh netting I use for making shirt screens over my face. A broom in my hands, the only thing I found was my handylady gingerly coming into my home to check on my status. I looked ridiculous. My status was zero. I wondered if I had dreamt the whole thing after all.

I decided I had to wait until the bat came out to play again, mostly because I was too lazy to work hard to find it. I pulled out the window screen and prepared a towel, my broom, a headlamp, and went about my daily business. While watching TV tonight, I thought about the bat and looked into my room. As if summoned, the bat swooped out of my closet and began its whirl around the room.

I jumped up and ran to the bathroom. I suddenly had to pee. I then ran and grabbed my hat, put on my headlamp and walked in, closing the door behind me. Shaking! I can’t believe how shaky my hands were. At first the bat swooped and dipped to me swinging at it with the broom, yelling “Come one baby, go out the window”. Oh, and lets not forget constant “Ayyyiaaa.”

The window wasn’t opened. Crap. I hurried over, yelping at the top of my lungs “Hold on” while pushing up its exit, “Now, go through the window, baby, go!” I have no clue why I sound like a hairy chested man with gold chains when I talk to bats.

It wouldn’t go. I tried to show it how to go by flapping my broom, while ducking its path, motioning to the window with my broom. About 3 minutes in, I think we both were exhausted by the experiment, me leaning against my bedroom door in terror, and the bat perched on the blinds. I picked up my towel and walked toward the thing. I have never shaken this much in my life.

I stood there for what felt like eternity, the bat and I in a stare down. It was kind of cute. I did NOT try and scratch it behind the ears. I don’t think the bat is evil…just lost in my home. I wanted to assist it in leaving and me my own peace of mind. I did not want to accidently hurt it because I was afraid of it hurting me. Finality came when I asked the bat, “If you just let me grab you, I’ll toss you out the window without harm, I promise.” I swear the bat nodded at me. Perhaps it was projection, but I think we were both tired of it being in my room.

Then I grabbed the sucker and it just yield to the towel that engulfed it as I threw it out the window. Who-rah. Be free, bat! Don't come back.

I think the bat got in through my fireplace chimney…I have now closed the vent.

Thanks to all for your words. I find writing helps me to get through situations, and it helped to write the earlier post. Your words were a nice surprise to see.