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"Power lines, my travlin' partner on this ride. Dripping, pulling - up and down, in this sing song, their lullaby blends with the swaying train. I curl myself into this journey; folding myself up into this pocket of time. Old familiars greet me - that swing set in the back yard, the ruins of an old church covered in new birth and old - mixed with unremembered newness." Journal Entry, October 13, 2005~ ~~~~~~~~~~~~All words are copyrighted by GoGo on a Page/gogoroku.

Saturday, January 28, 2006

Attend to Your Intentions

Took a trip out of town today. Traveled out of town to my home town to get the car looked at. The end of the story is I now have a functioning car, one part lighter, that may or may not get replaced in the future. I no longer have to drive randomly to keep it charged. Whoot.

Travel always unblocks me. Sometimes, I feel mentally constipated by everything happening in my life, and driving down the highway, letting the scene move around me, breaks up all that feels stuck in me. I woke up before dawn and left town in the cover of night. Drove in silence, the hum of wheel to road lulled me into a sense of quiet. My home town is west of my new home, so I took the highway west, watching the sunrise on the left side of my car (You go south a bit).

I wish I could express the feelings that went through me as I drove this morning. The darkness covered me like a blanket, my eyes were tired from the early morning departure, and my body felt exhausted from the tasky-ness of school and work these days. Then the sun cracked the horizon and instantly filled the sky with tinted hews of orange and yellows, blending into the perfect color of rose in the sky. Even though I have seen a thousand sunrises before, it all felt new as though this event was one in a lifetime. It felt like I was collecting myself on the edge of this sunrise. One moment, I am driving in darkness, covered and hidden. The next, that golden yoke burning in the sky exposed me new and fresh. I was born at sunrise...I believe I will die at sunrise, and all of them in between are what carry me forward.

On the way back here...home from the home town, the day was beautiful and bright. Most of the snow is gone, leaving a thousand shades of washed out browns, yellows, and oranges along the roadside. I believe water color is on winter's pallette. My radio now works in the car, but I turned it off after a few minutes in the drive. I have gotten accustomed to quiet. I like it.

The one other story I want to share from this day's trip is about a woman I met along the way home. I had gone into a gas station to grab a water and go to the bathroom and she sat on a bench outside the door. As I went in, she stopped me and asked me "What is your intention these days?" Puzzled, confused, and pretty much hesitant to talk to someone roosting outside a gas station, I tried not to respond. She returned my silence with "Do not ignore me, missy. What is your intention these days?" I paused, I thought - mostly about how the hell I was going to get out of the situation, but then responded "I have no clue what my intentions are these days."

The woman looked me up and down again, smiled and said, "Then you better attend to them."
I blink, I smile, and went inside. Life lesson?

4 Comments:

Blogger kookiejar said...

beautiful post! haven't seen sunrise in a while...... and attending to one's intentions is a gem of an advice!!!

5:16 AM, January 28, 2006  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I like your writing. Especially Half baked truths & Parliments & Where's Lassie. Funny & honest

6:37 AM, January 28, 2006  
Blogger GoGo said...

Thanks for the wonderful reponses!

Half Baked is my favorite blog writing to date.

12:44 AM, January 29, 2006  
Blogger Wenda said...

Found my way here through a comment you left elsewhere. I'm enjoying your writing. Reminders pop up at the most unusual times and places. Thanks for this one.

2:20 AM, February 04, 2006  

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